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I do not want this.

December 7, 2009

 I would not want to judge anyone, lest someone/thing should hurl judgment down upon me…but please, I don’t want to become a female body builder. I’m sure you don’t want this for me either. Surely the outcome, well, looks horrifying. 

Recently, I seem to have met some yoga teachers from the opposing camp. They seemed down right hell bent on banishing my flabby abs, thunder thighs and bat wings. For this, I should probably thank them…but it is the several day period of pain that slows the arrival of my gratitude.

In my yoga “tourism” of New York City I have had plenty of opportunities to experience a wide variety of yogic paths and teaching styles. Not all are created equal, but almost every single one of them has their highlights. That said, some of them also have pit falls in my opinion. I’m sure from the masochists out there, there will be stern disagreement, but I do not like distinct efforts to “strengthen” one thing or another in the space of a single class.  To me it seems out of the yogic picture, and more like something that should be happening with a personal trainer at an Equinox. I know that there is no rule that says that yoga cannot also be exercise, but I feel that one should seek out yoga for its well-rounded physio-spiritual nature.

I have down right gone on strike during “core strengthening” sets misplaced in the middle of my yoga practice at Yoga to the People. I laid face down on the floor, unable to move,  in a puddle of my sweat and tears after 1.5 hours of double chaturangas followed by a “peak pose” of albatross at Yoga Effects. On Friday, I took a Kundalini class with only one discernable asana in a full hour and half series but am still experiencing warm pain in my lower abdomen and hip flexors from a 11 minute set of leg lifts. Last Sunday I visited Jaya in Windsor terrace and needed 3 days to let my shoulders recover from 45 minutes straight of dolphins, inversion prep and, finally, the inversions themselves.

General commentary on this trend of hurting me was necessary, I believe. With the exception of  Yoga Effects, I actually enjoyed the classes at all of these studios, and owe them a true review other than the whiney post about how “they hurt me.” But seriously? I do yoga A LOT, obviously, and am sore a majority of the days of my life. Why is this? Do I not eat enough bananas? Should I cease and desist my regular dietary practices and replace all with coconut waters, lean chicken and bananas?

Perhaps I’ll just suck it up. I’m going to start collecting my string bikinis, body gloss, vaseline, 50 lbs weights and gear up to take my first female body building  title.

Meet my yogic demands, or my body building future will crush you.

[Image via: Triple M]

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