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What you want, baby I got it.

November 17, 2009

In these days where diversification is essential, IYI is the king of the yoga centers in NYC. (Granted, the others will have time to shock and awe me, but for now…)

As previously noted, I was lured to Integral Yoga Institute by a nude yoga class  class called Yoga and Networking for the Unemployed. Well, I showed up on the wrong day (typical) and was left with plenty of time to peruse the vast offering of classes by IYI.

Here are some highlights:

Yoga for the Unfit and Inflexible: Ochan, stop making excuses. Apparently, yoga is now for everyone. Stop complaining about how “muscular” your shoulders are and how limited your range of motion is. Suck it up. (file under excuses…)

Knee Care and Yoga: I’m legitimately interested in this yoga because I mysteriously have knees of a 90 year old. This, however, isn’t quite as bad as my friend Kev who has knees of a dead person. Whether you have bad knees, or ghost knees  or no knees  you can now improve them through your yoga.

Yoga and Power Animals: I am personally going to find that kid from Jivamukti Mediation that does the Gregorian chanting. Shit, I don’t even want to meet my power animal. I want to meet his power animal. I just know mine would be something lame like  a jaguar. His was a friggin’ lion with blue angel wings and wolverine claws that wears a diva wig and line dances to Garth Brooks or something like that.

Wah! A Kirtan and Concert:  Swami Satchidananda meets Bon Jovi.

Native American Pipe Ceremony and Yogic Shape Shifting: Because in my early yogic days I had the priviledge of briefly dating a ShIT (shaman in training) who stopped seeing me because I was reticent about drinking his jungle brew and finding god through projectile vomiting. Perhaps, though,  it IS  time for a revelation.

Spa Day for Women: Seriously, all joking aside, I am doing this and it sounds AMAZING. For $108 you get a “full-day nurturing experience including Hatha Yoga, meditation, and a yummy vegan lunch and featuring Reiki, Qigong, facials, and a personal body treatment.”

Aside from all of these special courses and workshops (which most of the above are) they have a great offering of standard classes with varying durations. They’ve got your regular hatha, your [insert time of day] hathas, Relaxations, Yoga for Vets and even HIV Yoga. Now, if that’s not well-rounded. I’m not sure what is.

[ Original image via: Integral Yoga Hatha by Yogiraj Sri Swami Satchidananda]

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